Matrimonial Blog
A new book is offering tips on how to keep a marriage strong and its authors say that it is all possible through a close economic analysis.
“Spousonomics”, the book written by Jenny Anderson and Paula Szuchman, talks about how couples can economise their time and efforts.
“Economics is the study of scarce resources. What is more scarce in your marriage than time, energy, love, libido?” ABC News quoted Anderson as saying.
Common wisdom suggests that happy couples share responsibilities like laundry, dishes and cleaning.
And according to a survey by the Pew Research Center, the most important things in a successful marriage are faithfulness, sex, and sharing household chores.
But the authors say that while dividing every chore may seem fair, economics says it is folly.
“If you’re doing half and I’m doing half of each task, then the time we’re spending on everything is actually greater than if we specialise,” Szuchman said.
Take, for instance, a hypothetical couple, Jack and Jane. It takes Jack 30 minutes to do the laundry and 20 minutes to walk the dog. Jane can do the laundry in 45 minutes and walk the dog in 25.
If they each do the tasks half the time, it would take them a total of 420 minutes per week.
Even though Jack is better at both tasks, it’s in the couple’s interest to split responsibilities according to ability and take advantage of what economists call comparative advantage.
Jack should just do laundry because he’s comparatively better at it, and Jane should just walk the dog because she’s comparatively better at it. By specialising, they could save 36 minutes a week.
“Everybody has to do something. This is a system for dividing it up in a way that’s more efficient,” Szuchman said.
It all boils down to simple supply and demand. In business, when the cost of something goes up, the demand goes down.
“This can be true for sex as well. When you make it cheaper — and we don’t mean in monetary terms, we mean in terms of time and energy — demand for it can rise,” Anderson said.
“The more expensive sex is, you are celibate, and the cheaper it is, you are a rabbit,” Szuchman stated.
Couples can have “cheaper” sex, the economists say, by finding different times of the day. Make it a priority and don’t wait until you’re in bed ready for sleep.
The bottom line is that if you have more sex, you’ll have more sex.
And on disagreements and fights, the economists say the old advice to keep talking and never go to bed angry, does not work well.
“Right, that’s bad advice,” Anderson said.
Economics says that sometimes, at least, the best thing is to simply shut up and stay angry.
“We hate to lose. Economists have quantified that we hate to lose twice as much as we like to win,” Anderson stated.
So to combat that instinct, they say, it’s better simply to go to bed angry and wake up in the morning with a clear head.
And even when frustrations boil over, Szuchman and Anderson say it’s vital to remember how great marriage can be and try to make things work.
“Marriage is a long-term investment. The last thing you want to do, when you start panicking that life isn’t as sweet as it used to be, is run out the door looking for a replacement,” Szuchman added.
Article Source: http://lifestyle.in.msn.com/relationships/article.aspx?cp-documentid=5011749
Dating may have become hi-tech, but romantic rituals remain much the same, says a new study. Like in traditional dating, online love birds are influenced by non-verbal cues like spelling errors, the number of exclamation marks and the use of grammar.
Zoe Hazelwood, psychologist at the Queensland University of Technology (QUT), who led the study, has found that traditional and online dating are, in fact, very similar.
For example, she found non-verbal communication was also just as important in online dating as it was in traditional dating, according to a QUT statement.
“Although online traditional non-verbal cues are not present, in our research we found people do judge potential partners on things aside from what they are saying,” she said.
“People form impressions online based on things like spelling errors, use of acronyms, amount of exclamation marks, use of grammar – things like that.
“They may not pursue a relationship with someone if they do not like their writing style, or feel they have poor spelling.”
Another habit that is present in traditional and online dating was the tendency to present ourselves as – just slightly – more interesting and interested than we actually are at the start of a relationship.
Online dating has also allowed an avenue for people young and old to reach out and find connections, said Hazelwood.
“One of the things I found pleasing was that online dating stretched across all age groups,” she said. “In our research, one of the participants was a 76-year-old female. She and her partner, who was the same age, met online and were getting married.”
Hazelwood’s research found that traditional daters and online daters had roughly the same relationship success rate – despite many people believing that online dating was not as likely to be as successful as traditional dating.
Article Source: http://lifestyle.in.msn.com/relationships/article.aspx?cp-documentid=4928255&page=0
London: More than half of British women pay for themselves on a first date, even though men still want to pay, according to a survey.
A poll of 1,924 adults for online bank first direct found that 58 percent of women expect to split the bill on a first date, double the proportion of men (29 percent).
Additionally, 14 percent of women think it should be whoever suggested the date.
Only a quarter of women said that they thought men should pay for a first date, while three percent said they themselves should foot the bill, suggesting that women feel they should not be beholden to men, but that men should also pay their way.
Male respondents on the other hand believed that chivalry isn`t dead, with 55 percent expecting to pay the full bill on a first date, and men spending an average of 65 pounds ($104) on a first date compared to women who spend 50 pounds.
Shouldering not just the financial burden but also the organizational responsibility, more than nine in 10 males (94 percent) said they would organize the first date, compared with just 65 percent of women.
Highlighting the financial considerations behind dating, 38 percent of people would use discount vouchers on a first date, a figure slightly higher for men (41 percent) than women (36)
“As we approach the wedding season, the couple on everyone`s lips is Kate Middleton and Prince William,” first direct Senior Savings Product Manager Richard Brown said in a statement. “It would be fascinating to know if they split the bill or if William paid and pulled out a discount voucher on their first date.”
Article Source: http://spicezee.zeenews.com/articles/story84712.htm
A new research has suggested that relationships in which the woman is more attractive than the man are more likely to fail.
Scientists from Stirling, Chester and Liverpool universities found that beautiful women seem to realise they can pick and choose their mates, whereas an attractive man with a more ordinary woman seemed to be more content and less likely to stray, reports the Telegraph.
Researchers took photographs of men and women in over 100 couples, some of whom had been together for a few months, others for many years, and they were then rated on looks.
The analysis showed that in relationships pairing a “beauty” with an average man, it tended to last only a matter of months.
Rob Burriss, one of the researchers, said: “This would indicate it is the woman who is in control of whether the relationship continues.”
He added that beautiful women may realise they can afford to pick and choose.
Conversely, the less attractive women “may have to make do with what they have, hence the longer relationships“, he said.
The work was published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.
Article Source: http://lifestyle.in.msn.com/relationships/article.aspx?cp-documentid=4993825&page=0
Shop yet save – Isn’t that such a smart idea? Yes many may agree to the fact that it’s easy to say so but tough to follow. But it’s on our hands to make the choice and the sooner, the better.
Who doesn’t love shopping? The very word brings smile to many and an urge to get all dressed up to do the act. Its something that’s enjoyed by many women and for certain it’s a secret desire and a fantasy to shop all time and have enough money to perform the needed. Everyone loves shopping. But looking in to your wallet post shopping, or seeing the month end credit card bill gives the shocks of your life and some even faint & fall ill.
Shopping has become an activity, a habit and a hobby to many. Shopping is not a bad idea to lose weight but it forces you to lose money as well. There are different ways to spend money but only one way to earn it and that is, hard work.
Sometimes shopping is advised as a stress free activity, but to avoid it from becoming the most stressful & dreadful thing in your life, one need to follow certain tips and know some helpful ways to shop less and save more.
Though shopping gives you a thrill, it is a money-eating bug. However there are some occasions and festivals for which shopping is a must. In such cases you should control yourself and avoid unnecessary shopping. In that case
Make a list
Prepare a list of things which you actually need before you go out for shopping. This will help you avoid buying unnecessary things. Do not buy any other item, which is not in your shopping list.
Beware of malls
Shopping in malls is the most satisfying thing to do. Malls are a rage. As soon as you step in to one, the Air-conditioned, the music, the ambience and the space transcend you into a different world. You suddenly feel so welcome and important. Who would not enjoy buying things in a feel good mall than buying from the local supermarket or grocery stores? Shopping in a mall is an experience in itself for many. The big carts provide you a big space to dump in more than you need. Your hands are free and you simply move around and dropping things in your cart. There is a salesperson at your beck and call to make you feel like a king or queen. There is so much to shop; you keep wishing that you had more credit cards. There is so much available in a mall that you are confused about where to enter and what to buy. Sometimes the offer may be so tempting that you just cannot stop yourself of buying yourself one. Every tall shelf stacked with a variety of products beckons you like a child in fantasy land. Avoid shopping from the shopping malls as goods are offered at higher rates here. The outlets in shopping malls may inspire you to shop more. But if you can control your desire from shopping than what you actually need then you can opt for it. Window shopping is better than scratching your hand at the end of shopping!
Resisting Temptations
If at all you end up liking something beyond your list, do not buy it. Move away from it and think if you really need it and how much would you use it if you did buy it. Stay away from words like free, discounts, and sales. They are the biggest crowd pullers. Avoid communicating with the salesperson as they may inspire you to buy unnecessary things.
Going the cash way
Say a big no to credit cards being carried in your wallet on your way to the shop. Avoid carrying credit cards while shopping and carry limited amount of cash during shopping. Also avoid paying by your debit or credit card. Paying by cash shows you how much money are you blowing up. So keep those power cards way to avoid debt and over expenditure. Carry extra money for conveyance and be smart.
Managing the Space
Think before you act is the key. Where would you park your car if you did not have parking space? The same logic applies to your house. Where would you store things in cupboards and cabinets already overflowing with stuff? Always think of the space you can afford, before you buy anything.
Choose the right shop
Try buying your requirements from the shops that offer discounts. If you are shopping clothes find out the rates of clothes from two three shops and try to bargain. Wait for off-season sales held by good branded clothes stores. Sometimes planning is the healthy way to avoid such circumstances.
Regular Shop
In case of shopping for grocery items avoid visiting many shops and its better and safe to buy from your usual grocery shop and from the shop that will provide all your requirements. As you will get acquainted shopping from same shop you can order your grocery requirements through telephone. This is because most of the shops offer free home-delivery service if you buy grocery in bulk. But do not take it for granted and buy things in credit.
Other checklist for being a smart & wise buyer
• Avoid shopping frequently. This will lead you to buy unnecessary things.
• Plan shopping for the festivals at least twenty days before. This will help you to avoid paying unreasonable price during festivals.
• It’s better to avoid online shopping as it would cost you with shipping charges and the rates would be more.
• Check the outlets, which are close to your residence. This will help you to save on the traveling cost.
• Take trials and take time to decide
• Avoid picking up from baskets near cash counter. You are done with your shopping
• Avoid taking kids along with you for shopping, as you may have to spend unnecessarily and always try going out for shopping all alone in the morning or afternoon. This will save your time as well as confusion.
In this way we can bid adios to our needless shopping and save money rather than being confused and agitated for paying the bills when our shopping goes beyond our limited budget. Before you drop anything in your shopping cart, ask yourself, ‘why do I need this’? Once you get the answer to this basic question shopping will be much simpler. Better to act smart than to crib. Shopping is forever. Remember there will always be something you have to buy till the time you live. Human needs are never over. As the saying goes, ‘A penny saved is a penny earned’. Your bills will be shorter and wallets, heavier. So begin to be a smart shopper today.
Article source: http://in.88db.com/chennai/html/images/articles/lifestyle/shopaholics-agenda.html